JEXJALUO ****
Ja-Luo is an animal
By Harrison Wayoga
Scientists are certain that there will be no other animal like a jeng'. Judgingby the nature of his character, any attempt todig him, makes you the world's greatestdem fool idiot. Unless you and him are riblets, don't be foolish enough to think that you candig his aphorisms.Ja-luo, as my grandmother used to say "riek ma tiende oke". Just too smart his legs are astride.
Ja-luois a six million organic behavorial phlegma of obscurities. These animals are strange in their character.You can spy on them day and night with telescopes mounted on bedroom windows, but at the end, you leave that placewondering, how did theyget downto the good oldearth? Which UFO brought these animals to theland of goodiesso that we have to grab while watching out for them?
Now it is becoming so much of a pain in the ass to deal with a millenium jeng' whose grandfathers got baked in the Sudanese desert, and whose great grandfathersdrove gods crazy enough to bundlethem out of Egypt. How do you deal with a guy like this in a wretched piece of earth like Kenya? How do you clip his wings? It is easy, Ja-luo is a diologue fanatic, he thinks everybody wants to sit down and reason. Throw dialogue on his lap and kaboom, you got him. Fry him in his own diologue oil.
Ja-luo is the only person in Kenya who wants to sit on the table waiting for the food to be served. He doesn't know guys are eating in the kitchen. But the time he realized, it is too late.
Why he is scary:
He is the lenglelesa ang'eyo in science, he is the best mathematician, he invented it during his good old days in Egypt, heis the engineer and the smarstest architect the world ever produced, and nobody knows why heloved the dead so much he build him a pyramid? What exactly is in the dead manfor this guy?
Why does he have to treat the dead person with dignity, he has to mummify him, burry him with expensive stuff, and then turn around and partyat the funeral like crazy? He strums the guitar, he sings like a baby, he is a jiggy with it, he can kick the hell out of a football from one goal post to the other, and so, he has happened to bea blendof a plethora of uncertainties?
His gods ran away from him living him in trouble with deseases, poverty,and a bunch of tribalist bedfellows around him weeding him out slowly from the mainstream politics! Gods do really have a big heart to hang' around, butsometimes dealing with this kind of a character you need to really have a big heart indeedand patience likean elephant to shephered this animal because this animal is weird.
The Brits who went around the worldswagaring the hell out of theweaklings conquring them and bullying them arrived on the lake shores and were taken a back. Wait a minute !Lord have mercy " we thought we are the proudest ochung' tirs, but who innyakalaga's nameare these ones?
They foundthe real odiero in black, peackock proud,twitching with his neck high like a Giraffe, so arrogant to the bones, andabsolutely unbwogable. Dem, we thought we hate peoples languages our English is the bomb, but this ones speak nothing buthis dholuo. Any other language is percieved to be the langauge of conmen. Only on his dead body will he ever speak it.
Well, Brits built classrooms to teach thejeng' how to speak their English and the Jeng' spoke it so well the Brit got a heart attack, died before the end of the first period, and the story is that when other mzungus came to bury him,the theory isthat"kamkuot na mnege". meaning that kama okuot ema onege (the swollen gland killed him ) Not the heart attack.
In return, the Jeng' never built any classrooms to teach their proudly, loudly spoken lingua (dholuo). Know it, speak it or sit there and look lost in the quag like a monkey. Dholuo is marwa, we speak it as loud, and we speak it the way we want. The Brits stood there and truly looked lost in the quag like a real monkey. All they could do is to climbed their pundas, went back to central Kenya to strike a land deal with Kyuks.
A while ago, folks could understand why brits are arrogant because they were some very wealthy aristocrats. Nobody understood why Luos act arrogant? What arrogance, yet stuck in the belly of Kenya's abject poverty? Mistake number one for those who take the Luos to be arrogant. Ja-Luo would rather be poor sleeping on amat but he is not going to stoop low for something less.
He is going to drive a Benz, he is going to wire his digs, he is going to buy himself four cell phones and as far as he is concerned, that is all he can get out of Kenya, for Kenya will never offerjaluo anything more than four cell phones around his waist. Ja-luo is living his life to the fullest in Kenya. Let tomorrow come with its own stuff. Right now, we have to live like there will be no tomorrow.
Luos love life, good things, clean shoes, clean shirt,a tie and office desk, however, meagre he is getting paid.... Ja-luo is not going to dig graves for a living no matter how much you promise to pay him.
To be cont......
Wayoga Ja-luo Mnyama
Ka in gi mari moro ma di wandik ka to orni
Akelo,Nyar
Kager
jaluo@jaluo.com
Daher winjo dwondi in bende, iwinjo?
Kata inyalo oro twak kod weche manyien ne: Mig. Ajos wuod Atiga
WuonAbila@jaluo.com
: Riwruok mar JOLUO e Piny Ngima, orwaku uduto mondo ubed e kanyakla mar burani. Ornwa nyingi gi nondi kaka obedo. Riwruok e teko joka Nyanam.