Re:What is it with in-laws?

The problem with in-laws is not that no books have been written identifying some of the issues and offering some suggestions. No, for if anything, we have a lot of such books out there. The problem, in my opinion lies on the plain truth that we are dealing with relatives of either spouse and that's tough. What do I mean?

You see, the individual that you now claim to be your husband/wife and rightly so, had relatives before two of you met. The relationship was such that the old adage "blood is thicker than water," says it all.

So what's the solution? Here is how I will approach this issue:

1. Seeing that your spouse said yes to you from among so many ,she/he indeed loves you. Problems start to evolve when you start thinking otherwise.
2. Know and accept the fact that nothing, and I mean nothing will separate your spouse from family members. Whether you like it or not, that's the way things are. You are therefore better off not spending too much time reading into every little issue.
3. Fighting with your in-laws will never take you anywhere. Find a way of reaching them. If one method doesn't work, try another one. Asking your spouse to support you, say against his/her parents might not be a good idea after all.
4. Some of the issues,if not all, are going to be win,loose and not win,win as we might prefer.

But what about the in-laws themselves?

1. To the in-laws I say be careful lest you break the family of he/she whom you love.
2. While you are always welcome to give some advise, please know that the two are of age. Give them time to manage their affairs. Put all your energy on your family and let the two manage their affairs. If they need help, they will most definitely come to you.
3. Love and accept the two as part of the family. Do not try to divide and rule.

But above everything else,let us all turn our eyes upon Jesus, who alone is capable of changing our wicked hearts. Shall we?

Just a thought.

Pr Birai-0612-386-4608
www.maranathadventist.org